Sevenjoy's Blog

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Darkness and Light

Darkness:

Pulseless universe

Struggle, work, love, joy, survive,

Death, fertilizer.

Light:

Childlike image spark

Unites with consuming fire

Yet, the net is not torn!

Worship

So, back to Joshua (bear with me). On the Sunday following the Monday when I babysat for him, I sang on the worship team. As usual, the singers went up while the pastor was praying. When I got up there, I looked out at all the bowed heads, and through the people, all looking down, there was Joshua! He was standing on a pew, next to his mom, looking up at me with a huge smile, waving! I just about melted on the spot.

Is that how God feels when we worship him?

Unless you become as a little child….

Last week, my daughter called and said her babysitter’s child was sick. Could I take Joshua? Joshua is 14 months old, and that would be the first time I had him for a long time without his older sisters there too. I said he could come.

So here’s what happened: We had a great time! We ate, we examined Grandma’s stuff to find good toys, we played music and danced, I sang him to sleep when it was nap time — in short, I just loved him and our time together.

It was unexpected. It was like when my own children were young, and my heart was completely full and engrossed with them — each one of them. All six of them. It was that attentive, always-on-my-mind kind of love that I believe God has for us. You know, where you are thinking “Where is he?” “Is he hungry?” “Is he safe?” “Oh, isn’t that sweet?” “Look how smart he is.”

It felt like he was a part of me.

And so I learned about God’s love, in a body and soul way.

Grace: Nobody Gets It

I don’t mean nobody receives it. What I mean is EVERYBODY receives it, but nobody gets that. Actually, that’s not true. A lot of people “get it,” but those people are often marginalized.

Christians can say, by rote, “Grace means unmerited favor.” Then they can go on to say that God loves us no matter what.

But they don’t live that way!

Maybe they don’t believe that is really true. Maybe they don’t REALLY trust God that much. Maybe they think that God is limited and can’t accept them as they are — that they have to make some changes, and THEN they can be accepted as they are. Isn’t that like saying that my sins are bigger than God?

The Process

It started when I realized that human beings do things that are not logical, and don’t make sense. Human beings travel across the country to be with dying loved ones. Human beings sacrifice themselves for others, like in war, or even the act of rescuing a child from an oncoming car. Human beings give gifts of material things, and sacrificed lives.

In a survival of the fittest type universe, those things are not logical, so why do we do them?

I believe it is because we are made in the image of a God whose being is love. Love is giving up one’s life for another. Love was demonstrated by the God who is love. We get to have a bit of that divinity in us, because we are made in that image.

After I really knew that, I never again doubted that God Is. God demonstrates Gods self in others all around.

Looking for the Beginning

This is the beginning. The world isn’t what I thought it was. Jesus isn’t what I thought He was. The rules aren’t the rules. I’m 58 years old, and I think I’ve been deceived for a long time!

I have discovered that I have been using Christianity to justify things that are the exact opposite of what Jesus actually said! I mean, did He or did He not say “love your enemies,” and “pray for those who deceitfully use you.?”

He didn’t just say to love enemies who live an ocean away and never bother me. He didn’t qualify it.

And, why would I think I shouldn’t have to suffer in life, when he said I probably would?

It’s all backwards. We focus on making our lives comfortable — ourselves and our families — all in the name of virtuous duty. It’s as though we equate financial success for successful life in Christ.

Could anything be more opposite of what we see in our Lord?

So, I want my vision to be changed. I want my blindness to be healed. I want to really see.